2023 the year we learn to listen to life
Week 51--in which we listen to a sacred feminine voice in the night
Friends, soul writers, mystics, witches, and lovers of prayer,
Something shocking happened nine years ago on December 26, 2014. That afternoon, She arrived. Unannounced. Unbidden. She barged Her way into my life by pushing aside my usual salutation to “DG” in deep soul writing. “DG” had begun in April of 1997 as “Dear God,” but morphed rather quickly into “DG,” a more generic but still powerful divine Voice. I trusted that Voice.
But “DG” made an abrupt exit on Friday, December 26 that year.
I’d been sick all month with something mysterious and debilitating. I could do nothing more than sit and read, occasionally look up to stare out the window, and once or twice a day take something I was reading into a bit of deep soul writing.
Although I didn’t know why I was sick, or what was happening, or what was coming, I dare say Someone did. In perfect synchronicity, the only books on my reading table that December were about the Divine Feminine. The pile was rather high.
- I had three books on Mary Magdalene by Margaret Starbird which I’d purchased when Margaret spoke at a church near me earlier that year.
- I had my well-worn copy of The Meaning of Mary Magdalene by Cynthia Bourgeault, a book I revisit regularly.
- I also had Wisdom Has Built Her House, a dense theological treatise by a German feminist theologian on the dove, the symbol of the Divine Feminine, recurring throughout pre-history.I had purchased the book because Neil Douglas-Klotz recommended it in his bibliography in Blessings of the Cosmos, an essential resource for my own book, The Lotus and The Lily.
By December 26, I’d worked my way through four of these five books. I don’t remember what I was reading that afternoon. But I remember what happened.
I picked up my journal to explore something on the page, but when I tried to write “DG” my hand froze. I couldn’t get it to move. I was weary, weak, and annoyed.
I put my hand back down on the page and out came: Beloved Vibration of Sophia!
In that moment, everything changed. Because She, God the Mother; She, Creatrix of all Universes; She, the Goddess before all gods; She, the Queen of the Living and the Dead had arrived.
Not just in my house. Or on my page. She had arrived in my body. I could feel Her.
- I did not know, until that moment, the price women pay for worshiping a male god who spews laws and dogmas and judgments.
- I did not know, until that moment, that the Goddess was not an idea, not a myth, not a statue buried in pre-history.
She was alive. She was real. And She fit perfectly in my body.
Many Goddesses by Cathy Stevens Pratt
I sat in my chair for a long long time, slowly opening to how different it feels to be in a body that is sacred. So sacred, that She is alive in me. That phrase in Genesis about being made in god’s image…suddenly made perfect sense. Of course! I am made in Her likeness and so is every woman. We are Her sacred treasure of life. No wonder women and the Goddess were revered for millennia.
That afternoon, my health turned the corner, and by January 9 I was restored to my natural vibrant state. It felt strange and exciting to feel energetic again. So, I looked back and counted the days. Ha! I’d been “sick” for 40 days and 40 nights. Even I could figure that out.
I had been through an intense and total initiation.
Because that was such a sacred day, I began to pay attention to December 26. And sure enough, things happen on that day. Sacred things. Big things.
In the magic hour of 4am on December 26, 2019, I was awakened with a clear nudge to start writing. This is normal for me, especially since Prayer Artist arrived in 2018. So I grabbed the yellow pad beside me and started to write what I was hearing. Within two lines, I knew what I was being given and it scared the dickens out of me.
I had just begun to pray the rosary. But no rosary like I was taught as a Catholic school girl. I had read The Way of the Rose by Perdita Finn and Clark Strand, and was thrilled to learn that the rosary is a Goddess prayer that predates all our patriarchal religions.
In other words, the rosary is a prayer of “Beloved Vibration of Sophia!”
But there was one problem. As a child I was taught to say The Apostles’ Creed before starting a rosary. And there is no way on heaven or earth that I will say that prayer again. Every line reeks with patriarchal dogma and theology. With plenty of judgment and sin. Oh, and the one and only religion. I said it so often as a child that I’m sure I could repeat it, not just in English, but probably in Latin, too.
But those words, those lies, will never cross these lips again.
So I had a problem. I wanted to say the rosary, but didn’t know how to begin.
Beloved Vibration of Sophia! solved that problem on December 26, 2019 as She dictated The Queen’s Love. As I wrote the words in the dark, I knew what She was giving me. And it scared me.
I knew that The Queen’s Love doesn’t just replace the apostles’ creed, it shreds it.
I typed the prayer up in the morning and began to say it every day. Not just when I start a rosary but first thing in the morning and last thing at night. I love, love, love this prayer. But I kept it to myself. There was still a fear in me that this prayer was so radical that the fundamentalists would find me. And silence me.
But one day I worked up the courage to say it in a rosary circle and the women in the circle asked for it. Slowly, ever so slowly, I began to share it. Now, thousands of people say it. Maybe they say it the way I received it. Maybe they’ve created their own version.
Here’s what My Mother Sophia! dictated. Take it. It’s yours now. Consider it a December 26 gift.
The Queen's Love
©Janet Conner Dec 26, 2019
I sing the song of One Mother
and all Her Infinite Faces of Infinite Love
The Sun, the Moon, the Stars, the Earth, the Seas
Hawk above, Fox beside, Worm below
We are One Body, One Breath, One Love
Her Body, Her Breath, Her Love
She is our Beginning-less Beginning
She is our Endless End
Turning and returning, turning and returning
We are born and reborn into Love. Into Love
So it was. So it is. So it ever shall be
Life without end. World without end.
Love does not end.
This is Her Eternal Truth
What gift will She bring me—you—this December 26? I don’t know, but I’ll be listening,
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The forecast will be available all year.
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