Is there a brain wave for love?

Is there a brain wave for love?

This is a question I have not pondered before. But it asserted itself this week, first in the night, then repeatedly throughout the day. Didn’t matter if I was soul writing, praying, talking with friends, staring out the window, or lying in a hot bath.

All day and all night this question kept tapping me on the shoulder.

Suddenly I really need to know, is there a brain wave of love? And if there is, how can we nourish and support it until the brain wave of love becomes our predominant mode.

The question wouldn’t pester me if it weren’t important. And it is.

It may be the most important question we can ask right now.

Because the radical call of the 4 decade of 2020—2029 is to create a whole new structure of life. After 5,000 years of patriarchy, we can’t miss the painful truth: patriarchy makes suffering visible. Yes, I do believe it is that simple—and that horrible.

Patriarchy makes suffering visible.

Don't believe me? Look around. People are suffering. The land is suffering. Governments are collapsing. Children are dying.

If we wish to survive, if we wish our mother earth to survive, we have to make love visible. Yes I do believe it’s that simple.

We must make love visible.

So what does this have to do with brain waves?

There have been many studies on shifts in brain chemicals as people begin to bond. And science can track which parts of the brain light up and change when people meditate or fall in love.

But beyond neuropeptides and cortices, what about brain waves? That part isn’t so clear. So I think my question isn’t a common one—at least not in scientific circles. Perhaps, science is the wrong venue to ask it anyway.

Perhaps this question is a mystical one.

If you’ve read my books or been in any of my intensives, you know I’m head over heels in love with theta. I’ve been talking about theta for 12 years.

It all started when I interviewed Robert and Michelle Colt in 2007, wanting to know why they call writing THE most effective spiritual practice. (I thought that would be a kinda important quote for Writing Down Your Soul.)

As they talked about the efficacy of journaling, I began to describe my experience of radical divine guidance surfacing when my pen starts moving really fast across the page. I blurted, “I couldn’t lift the pen if I wanted to.”

There was silence for a moment. Then Robert said:

“I don’t know how you’ve done it, but you have trained yourself to enter mystical theta."


He could tell I had no idea what he was talking about, so he gave me a quick introduction to brain waves from fast stressed Beta, through work-focused Alpha, down to slow Theta, the portal between worlds, finally down to Delta, the brain wave of sleep.

At last, I had a name for my experience. Theta.

From that moment, I decided that if theta was the juice in deep soul writing, maybe it could be the juice off the page, too.

And sure enough, I began to train myself to expand my time in theta when awakened in the night, lying in the liminal space before getting up in the morning, in prayer, in yoga, while walking….

Eventually I realized we could spend most of our day in the creative, juicy, delicious—and occasionally ecstatic—Theta brain wave state.

And you know what happens then, don’t you!

  • Wild, outrageous, delicious creativity
  • Radical ideas you could never ever come up with on your own
  • Absurd synchronicities
  • Miracle after miracle
  • The whole world comes alive
  • Everything is conscious
  • Everything is alive

And everything is talking to you.

In other words, in theta you love and are loved. And you know it. You feel it. You feel it in every cell of your being.

So now I’m an advocate for theta. Not just in soul writing, but all day—and all night.

Especially in 2020.

If our shared responsibility in 2020 and beyond is to “make love visible,” then the single best thing I can offer are intensives that help you drop out of high-stress patriarchal Beta, where we suffer from relentless prodding to achieve, achieve, achieve, down into evocative, divine feminine Theta, where we are constantly surprised by what love can create.

One week ago I wasn’t sure what next year might look like.

But thanks to this magnificent question, “Is there a brain wave for love,” I now know the prayer intensives for 2020.

Each one is a theta feast. Each one a deep deep dive into the creative loving arms of the divine feminine who is calling us to please, please, Make Love Visible!

Here are my instructions for 2020:

  • January

    Theta—the Radical Brainwave of Love with my beloved embodied-theta sisters, Emma Kupu Mitchell and Keren Brown.

    If you were in Healing Your 3 Wombs, you know how deep we will go!


  • March

    The Radical Path of the Divine Feminine Hidden in the Rosary with Clark Strand and Perdita Finn, authors of The Way of the Rose

    They'll be on Praying at the Speed of Love twice in December. Get ready. This is the most radical and important book of the year.

  • May

    The Radical Path of the Divine Feminine Hidden in the Tree of Life with Rabbi Tirzah Firestone, author of The Receiving: Reclaiming Jewish Women’s Wisdom, a Kabbalah classic and Wounds into Wisdom, a profound book on healing intergenerational trauma.

    It was in my conversation with Tirzah on Praying at the Speed of Love that the radical prayer practice, They Are All Our Children was born.

  • July

    The Radical Path of Divine Feminine Love in Ho‛oponopono with Hawaiian Shaman, Kahu Lahela Johnson.

    This will be our 6th Ho‛oponopono intensive. I can't express how deeply I love this prayer and this Kahu!

  • September

    Meet Your Dark Goddess with Emma and Keren, a radical new mystical adventure to discover the PERSONAL goddess who is walking with you, your teacher, your guide, your love.

  • October

    Mary Magdalene's Radical Path of Love in Death and Resurrection led by the incomparable Meghan Don, author of The New Divine Feminine.

    Megan led us in two Mary Magdalene intensives in 2019 and we were altered forever.

Until then, you are still welcome to join The Lotus and The Lily.

We just opened last Monday.

We kicked it off with a rich week playing in Theta!

The Lotus and The Lily 

To training ourselves to swim in an endless sea of love in the brain wave of love--Theta!   

PS: If you missed last Sunday's newsletter on theta, you can read it on my blog

Listen to Stephen Post on Episode 18 and his wild stories of prophetic dreams in theta

You might also enjoy hearing Tirzah Firestone on Episode 10 talking about Shekinah, the feminine face of God.

And even if you're not in the Lotus and Lily, intensive, get the book and create your own 2020 mandala. It's superb practice for a year of theta ahead.

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